The parrot-owning proprietor of the boat rental shop has flown the coop. Until he’s recaptured, we have one final day to conduct an investigation.

Let’s make it count.

The most important takeaway you should have from this episode is that fast food and retail are thankless jobs. Also, fuck Arby’s and fuck Best Buy. Both those places suck to work for.

Are you ready for the most quoted line from any Ace Attorney game!? I know I certainly am!

Not a holiday season goes by where I don’t quote the phrase “Almost Christmas means it wasn’t Christmas” in condemnation of all the holiday-themed paraphernalia that makes itself known as early as September these days.

And likewise, this is where all of the information we gleaned in yesterday’s investigation comes into play. Or at least, it starts to. Just wait until next week, when Phoenix Wright finally jumps the shark.

The next trial is set to start soon, so had better find out all we can, both about the circumstances of the case and our mysterious new witness to the crime.

This is one of those moments in the investigation where all of the things we’re learning don’t make much sense right now. However, these segments are always in service to the trial that follows, laying the groundwork for the discoveries that we will be directed to later on.

In this first game, the development team is skilled in their ability to control the flow of information to the player, both to preserve the suspense and intrigue of the case while still offering satisfying opportunities to deduce what happened on our own, with a bit of guidance from the writing, as I’m sure we’ll find out in due course.

Looks like we have a Lotta trouble on our hands, but an opening has been created. Now, we need to take advantage of it.

Since we don’t have much to discuss today, I’ll use this time to mention something that comes up later on in this batch of episodes.

The often-cited statistic that 99% of all cases brought to trial in Japan end with a guilty verdict was brought up in conversation, and Twitch chat wondered how true that statistic is. I took some time to look into it, and while a few minutes on Google is no replacement for genuine research and journalism, both the BBC and the Human Rights Campaign are credible sources who each wrote articles about the injustice of the Japanese Legal System in January and May of 2023 respectively. It was shockingly easy to find these pieces.

And they each paint a damning picture. I’m not fond of the criminal justice system in the US for the amount of police and prosecutorial injustice found within it, but some of the cases cited by the Human Rights Campaign and the BBC in their respective reports make our legal system here look tame by comparison. If anything, the cartoony and outlandish behavior of the prosecutors and judges in the Ace Attorney games are far easier to swallow.

With Edgeworth joining us on this side of the aisle, whoever they bring to prosecute couldn’t possibly be worse, right?

Right, Wright!?

It’s easy to tell in this first game that the development team was not confident that they could get a sequel off the ground. Someone as menacing as prosecutor Manfred von Karma, and his complete command of the courtroom, including the judge, serves as a perfect antagonist for the finale. Down to his menacingly deep “Objection”, he establishes himself quickly as a credible threat that won’t budge an inch the way Edgeworth might have.

And though we don’t feel the change mechanically, writing-wise there’s a strong distinction between how Edgeworth and Karma prosecute. Edgeworth is quite content to allow Phoenix to press witnesses and then point out how he’s bumbling and stumbling to undermine the defense attorney’s credibility. On the other hand, von Karma more frequently and openly objections as often as he possibly can, refusing to concede even small questions that could create openings. Even though we don’t experience hopelessness because we know that we haven’t made any mistakes, the characters do. Maya even had to sidestep courtroom procedure and get arrested to give us the crack we needed to proceed.

As always, we’re going to perform a turnabout. But before we do, we need to let the pressure build for maximum dramatic effect.

We’re still no closer to getting Edgeworth to sign us on as his attorneys, and the trial date is closing in. Our client(?) needs us, and that means we need to get busy.

That tidbit about how they wanted to reuse Larry Butz to save space, turning recurring characters into a series-long gag, also came from Gita Jackson’s piece in A Profound Waste of Time, Issue 3 where she interviewed series creator Shu Takemi.

That said, even without him, we can already see how everyone’s personal histories are being woven together into a single, final case. It’s deft work, and when we get to the trial next time, I hope we get to dive further into it.

What else is there to be said aside from “Merry Christmas”?

I like the dynamic of this investigation scene because while we are technically investigating the murder, most of our time is spent trying to convince the suspect that they should take us on as legal counsel. Edgeworth is simply too attractive to be the murderer, and we all know it. But even still, we can’t help a client who refuses to be our client.

And that merely sets the stage for the rest of this case. Next time, our investigation continues.

At this point, though some details are unclear, we have a solid idea of who our culprit is. Lucky for us, our prime suspect has seen fit to take the stand.

Let’s break her testimony.

I absolutely respect the Wrightworth shippers. It’s clear the two characters have a natural chemistry that only deepens throughout the series, and it’s not too difficult to read into that. Unfortunately, they are wrong.

The fact remains that Miles Edgeworth is ace/aro, and belongs in that community.

And no, I will not be taking questions at this time.

We have one more chance to conduct our investigation before the final trial for the murder of Jack Hammer. Unless we can deduce who the true killer is, we’ll be in deep trouble.

Time to roll up our sleeves and get to work.

Again, I want to shout out Detective Dick Gumshoe for showing no fear whatsoever in taking on a group of mafia men by himself and being threatening enough to get them to step down. Sure, partially it’s because once the police are aware there’s no point in trying to hide anything, but it’s still something.

As for us, we’ll need to be equally impressive in the trial, or else Will Powers is going to spend the rest of his days in prison. Tune in next time for the excitement.

We just need one more day to investigate the crime. One more day, and we can finger the true culprit. Can we buy that time at trial?

I sure hope so.

I’m genuinely happy that it’s been long enough that I didn’t wholly remember the big twist with the Steel Samurai outfit being worn by the victim, and outside Studio Two. When I said before the monkey head not blocking off the path was a minor blemish, this is why.

Though we don’t have the crucial information from Cody’s photo until the last minute, every single detail aside from that is established well ahead of time. We know that Studio Two was blocked off, and we had the bottle of sleeping pills from our investigation. I hesitate to say it was possible to figure it out ahead of time, but the big twist that our victim was in the suit doesn’t come out of thin air. Rather, it’s the logical consequence of the chain of facts build-up until that point.

It’s a masterpiece of murder mystery writing, and you’ll find as we progress that artistry is maintained across the entire series. Next week, we should wrap up Turnabout Samurai and get to my favorite case from the first game.