Alright, with all of our prior obligations handled, it is time to begin The Tyranny of King Washington!

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Acharky at https://bsky.app/profile/acharky.bsky.social

While certain missions go on just a bit longer than it feels like they need to, thus far gameplay-wise this is all fairly typical of an Assassin’s Creed game of this era. I don’t have much to say about the moment-to-moment action that I haven’t already said about the other Desmond games.

And yet, I have having the time of my life watched Ratonhnhaké꞉ton become dislodged from the reality he knows and thrust into the absolutely, delightfully absurd what-if scenario where George Washington becomes the most delightfully evil cartoon supervillain. It is honestly an inspired choice to just use the existing lore and do something fun with it. Something that, while technically possible in Assassin’s Creed canon, is so over-the-top that even Ubisoft would never make it part of the official timeline.

I can’t wait to punish this little shit.

With the main game out of the way, Acharky and I are almost ready to start the Tyranny of King Washington. However, before we do, we have a couple of loose ends to tie-up.

Streamed at https://www.twitch.tv/newdarkcloud

It’s honestly a bold choice to use the post-game epilogue as a way of highlighting just how despite all the work he put into stopping the Templars, Ratonhnhaké꞉ton received none of the benefits he fought for. Even in light of a successful revolution, the Native American people had to flee their homes and slavery only continued to grow under the thumb of colonial, wealthy imperialists. It would have been even more poignant if his cut final speech had accompanied it, but as it stands it still leaves a lasting impact.

In today’s world, there is much power in a hero who, even when the world does everything in can to silence him and prove how cruel it can be, still chooses to affirm justice, compassion, and humanity at every turn. We just didn’t appreciate it at the time.

With that, Acharky and I have finished the main thrust of Assassin’s Creed 3. Let’s talk a bit about the game and our final thoughts on it.

Streamed at https://www.twitch.tv/newdarkcloud

You can check out the cut Connor speech here.

Despite quite possibly the roughest finale in the entire series, I am overall significantly more positive on Assassin’s Creed 3 than I was going in. In hindsight, most of my problems with the game came from what I wanted to be and less what it was. I will still always want the Desmond-only game that I was promised and never received, and there’s nothing AC3 could have done to remedy that.

And yet, taken on its own terms much of it holds up well to this day. The only reason people don’t like Ratonhnhaké꞉ton is because they were comparing him to Ezio. Coming back to Assassin’s Creed 3 as an adult, I think he is one of the best protagonists this series has ever had. There’s a ton of depth and nuance to him and his actor’s performance that he comes across as one of the most complex characters in the franchise, especially when his backstory and history is thrown in.

There’s much to like here, but it’s tragically overshadowed by the circumstances surrounding the game. It never stood a chance.

(Minor Assassin’s Creed: Shadows spoilers from 19:51 to the end of the video.)

Our time with Ratonhnhaké꞉ton is at an end, which means we have to wrap up the remaining loose ends as Desmond before we finish.

And as Acharky and I can tell you, this section sucks.

Streamed at https://www.twitch.tv/newdarkcloud

It is shocking how poorly laid out this area is for anything remote approached fun and engaging parkour gameplay. I was intensely disappointed to come off the high I was riding in Connor’s finale with this abjectly miserable experience, followed by an even worse finale.

But, at least that means we’re at an end… or are we? Tune it next time for our Post-Game Conversation and a look into where we go from here.

(Minor Assassin’s Creed Shadow spoilers from 15:12-15:30.)

After all the posturing about how much cooler and better he was to the “savage” Ratonhnhaké꞉ton, the white-boy Charles Lee is trying to leave the country.

But he can’t leave yet. Acharky and I still haven’t shivved him yet.

Streamed at https://www.twitch.tv/newdarkcloud

I can’t say more than I said in the episode about how much the scene between Connor and Charles Lee at the bar sucks. At all times, Charles Lee presents himself to us as either a coward or a monster. To give them this moment of respect for each other when their relationship has been nothing but ruthlessly antagonistic feels cheap and hollow. It is sadly perfectly in line with what I would expect from Ubisoft’s creative team in that era, but that’s because I have low expectations.

Which, funnily enough, stands in stark contrast to the scene where Ratonhnhaké꞉ton buries Achilles next to his lost wife and child. By contrast, that scene logically follows from the way those characters interacted over the course of the game. The cinematic also makes heavy use of non-verbal communication and visual cues to convey the emotion of the scene in a way that words alone are incapable.

It’s a tasty morsel sandwiched between two incredibly awful sequences.

After helping our seaward allies, Acharky and I have secured the backup we need to finally go after Haytham Kenway and Charles Lee.

Streamed at https://www.twitch.tv/newdarkcloud

In hindsight, it’s funny that Ubisoft’s creative team felt the need to have Ratonhnhaké꞉ton brought low by shooting him with a cannon in order to make the fight against Haytham feel more fair. Otherwise, it would be another bog standard Assassin’s Creed “Boss Fight” where the player just mashes the attack button until the target falls over. The gimmick where we need to shove him into crates and barrels does just enough to make the fight relatively interesting for how fast it is.

But more than that, as the Templars reveal themselves to be the laughably inept cartoon supervillains that we know they are from Ezio’s games, the decision to start us off as Haytham becomes an even more bizarre choice in retrospect. It is the kind of move one makes when trying to engender sympathy for a character or faction. By having us play as Haytham while he rescues enslaved Native Americans, Ubisoft creates a situation where we’re made to empathize with them more.

Which makes it baffling because the moment we’re no longer on that side they show their true colors with so little hesitation that a reason person would be disturbed by their conduct. We’re constantly told they have a moral justification for their actions, but time-and-again it’s undermined by the callous and cruel way they treat the people around them.

It almost, at times, feels like multiple people in the writing room couldn’t quite come to a consensus on how their antagonists would be portrayed. And next episode, that comes into even sharper relief.

According to our fellow Assassins, Acharky and I are on the “home stretch” of Assassin’s Creed 3. Let’s see if there’s any truth to that.

Streamed at https://www.twitch.tv/newdarkcloud

While I’m not entirely convinced we went anywhere with that conversation about revenge as a storytelling device, it suppose it is at least worth noting that revenge frequently comes up as a motivating factor in Assassin’s Creed. That makes sense, since it gives the protagonist a simple enough justification for going after the Templar targets that ties into their backstory.

Like this story, for example. Charles Lee has to die for what he did, so we’re going to make that happen.

Even though Acharky and I were just witness to one of Ratonhnhaké꞉ton greatest king moments, we’re now thrust into the final playing Desmond mission in Assassin’s Creed 3.

And it’s as dull as all the others. Come and listen to us complain about it.

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I don’t have much more to say about Desmond that I haven’t already, but we’re getting close to the end of the game either way. Possibly next week, we’ll be done with Assassin’s Creed 3 proper and ready to move on to The Tyranny of King Washington.

But that remains to be seen. Until next time.

Ratonhnhaké꞉ton rides to New York, hoping to make peace with the Templars. Unfortunately, as Acharky and I know, they are never to be trusted.

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This is one of the most important scenes in the game for Ratonhnhaké꞉ton. It is the moment where he is forced to confront that reality that both the Templars and the colonists wouldn’t hesitate to kill him it he was an convenience. Further, that his people are beset on all sides by those who would end them.

And it is further heightened by Noah Watts’s excellent performance, where he dresses down both Washington for his betrayal and Haytham for using situation in a crass, naked attempt to manipulate him. I could sing it’s praises to the high heavens, but truly the scene stands on it’s own. Many other characters in this same situation would fail to see the manipulation, but Connor is wise enough to understand that the information on the attack was intentionally withheld from him in order to win his trust.

Of course, as always, Charles Lee is right there on Haytham’s orders to stoke the fires, inciting the Native peoples with his own rhetoric and propaganda. Yet another reason to want him dead.

Haytham and Connor continue to work together in pursuit of a mutual target. And while they do, Acharky and I continue to drink up the drama from their bickering.

Streamed at https://www.twitch.tv/newdarkcloud

In another case of Ubisoft’s “maybe the villain has a point” accidentally making a good argument, Haytham is correct about how the American Revolution was one of the people. It was of wealthy white landowning men. I found a clip of the episode of Adam Ruins Everything that Chris mention, and while I did not find the full episode in a place where it could be viewed for free, TruTV still maintains the page where the show cites it’s sources.

With that out of the way, this is a strong moment for Ratonhnhaké꞉ton, because it underlines much of the complexity that lies at the center of his character and his arc. He’s simultaneously both wise and naive in many respects. He understanding that freedom, life, and liberty are innately, intrinsically valuable, and he understands that many people around him wish to subvert those values.

At the same time, he is quick to assume good faith from those he works with, which can often be a source of conflict. To a fault, he is earnest and forthright. And as his father makes an offer to work with him, this earnestness once again comes into play. Even if he knows he probably can’t trust the man, he has to at least make the effort in case he’s wrong.

Hopefully, it won’t bite him in the ass.